The Acts of God have begun.

Scene 1
The camera focuses on a bar. Suddenly a limo drives up and parks in the street. Out walk Don Manly, Katy Stellar, and Matt Knoxville. The camera follows them into the bar. As Katy walks in several whistles are heard around the room. One man tries to get Katy to come over to his table. Then he sees Don Manly and lets go of her. Matt and Katy sit down at a table and Manly goes and gets some drinks. After twenty minutes and 3 drinks for each of them the three are quite drunk. Don Manly then starts speaking about their opponents on Fusion.

Don Manly
Can you believe those Straight Edge punks? They are missing out on so much fun. What kind of bozos wouldn't want to have fun with their lives?

Matt Knoxville
I know right? These guys have no chance of beating us this week. Funny thing huh? Guy was dead drunk all the time, and he was Intercontinental Champion, he goes straight edge and he loses everything. And then he even claims that it's helping him!

Don Manly
Straight Edge bozos are so weird. They take life way too seriously! Speaking of which, let's stop sitting around. Let's start partying!

Matt Knoxville
I hear ya!

The three than get up and go over to the dance floor. They start dancing away. Eventually a drunk guy grabs Katy. He starts talking to her, and then he starts taking her somewhere. She is too drunk to understand what is going on, so she follows him. Suddenly Manly sees him and charges at him. He punches him in the back of the head and he loses grip of Katy. Matt pulls Katy away. The man starts swinging at Manly. Manly being tougher, ignores the punches. Manly then lands a huge right hand on the guy. Suddenly on of the guys friends charges at Manly. Manly lifts him and flips him over his shoulders. The man crashes through a table. Suddenly a huge guy steps up. The man knees Manly in the gut, and Manly bends over. The man shoves Manly's head between his legs. He lifts him up onto his shoulders. Suddenly Manly starts swinging away at the man's head. The man loosens his grip and Manly falls down, smashing the man's head into the floor. The original guy is back up now with a chair. He lifts the chair, and is about to smash the chair over the back of Manly. Suddenly Matt Knoxville charges at him and spears him. Matt then mounts the man and starts punching away at him. The man is bloodied up. Suddenly several huge security guards come over and throw Manly and Knoxville out of the bar. Katy comes out of the bar soon. Don Manly sits up and dusts himself off.

Don Manly
I think it's best we get out of here.

Matt Knoxville
Good idea.

The three then enter the limo and the limo speeds off.
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Scene 2


The theme hits and fireworks explode all over the stage. After the pyro Don Manly, Katy Stellar, and Matt Knoxville come out. Stellar stands between the two men. Matt Knoxville and Katy Stellar enter the ring. Don Manly goes under the ring, and pulls out a chair. He throws one into the ring and Knoxville catches it. He then pulls out another and slides into the ring. Matt is sitting on the chair, and Don Manly sets his chair up then sits on it. Katy Stellar then sits on his lap. Don Manly then raises the mic and begins speaking.

Don Manly
We are the Acts of God, and we are the best in this company. We will take this company by storm and we will win the tag team championships. We will beat everyone who stands in our path from here on out, and there is not a man, nor woman, that can stop us. This week we face the Sons of Straight Edge in a tag team match. They say they are better than us cause they don't drink, or do drugs. You know what I have to say about that? BULLSHIT!

The fans start laughing at this.

I mean really...look at these guys. They think drinking somehow makes you weaker, and less focused, but let's think. How many straight edge wrestlers are there? Few. How many straight edge champs are there? Even fewer. These statistics obviously show, that being straight edge does not make you better. It means you are prone to failure, unless you have real talent, something very few of you straight edge bozos seem to have. You are an established tag team, yet last week, you were completely dominated by two men who had never even talked to each other before. Me and Knoxville, we have been friends for a very long time. We were in TNA together. There we dominated our opponents. We have teamed with each other since we were ten and wrestling in trampolines. We have a bond of friendship much stronger than any of your straight edge cult shit can ever form. Well I think I have said all I need to say about the straight edge bozos. Now one more thing before I give the mic over to Matt Knoxville. All of you know my girlfriend Katy Stellar right?

There are several whistles throughout the arena. Katy Stellar then smiles.

Don Manly
Well guess what. She has decided on putting on wrestling gear, and to enter the ring. Me and Knoxville have been training her for a while, and it seems she is almost ready for her debut. So next week she will face someone, anyone, on Fusion. She will also be accompanying us in our match at Fusion. Well enough talk from me. Let's give Matt some time.

Don then lowers his mic and Matt raises his...

Wow, excellent speech Don. How am I suppose to compete with that? All I really have to say is that we can't really lose to these guys, look at how scrawny they are!

Matt shows a picture of them on the titantron, the crowd begin to laugh.

You really think we will lose to these guys? If s raise your hand.

About five people put there hands up, they're obviously Straight Edge.

You see? Being "Straight Edge" isn't so good after all, those five people that put their hands up, even scrawnier than the two we are facing on Fusion. And if they thought they could beat us before, that video of us in the bar will certainly change their view of how the match will play out because we got drunk and we still put up a heck of a fight, so why don't you two just have a drink, you'll feel SO much better, Ain't that right Don?

Don nods his head in approval. Matt looks into the camera

Sons Of Straight Edge, whether you're ready to bring it or not, we're still going to pummel you to the ground in our match so you may as well not even bother showing up...

Matt looks back at the crowd then returns to the camera.

That is, if you know what's good for your health.

The three leave the ring as their music plays, Matt then shouts:

And not drinking ain't one of them!

They leave the arena and the crowd has gone wild.