RCF RAW

Hank Hanson vs CM Punk.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Punk receives a spinning neckbreaker from Hanson. Punk blocks a kick from Hank Hanson. Spinning back kick from CM Punk. CM Punk misses a clothesline...and takes out the referee accidentally! Springboard dropkick from CM Punk. Nicely done. Cover, but there's no one to count for CM Punk! Hank Hanson is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Hank Hanson snap suplexes Punk HARD to the canvas! And again! A pair of clotheslines follow and...yep, Hanson is now a bonifide HOUSE...EN...FUEGO~! Sloppy short range spear from Hank Hanson. There's a two count on the pin. Hank Hanson turns Punk inside-out with a clothesline. Reminds me of Willow's 'Bored Now' skin ripping finisher. Inside joke, don't worry about it. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Hank Hanson gets taken down out of nowhere! Spinning bulldog in the corner and Hanson is down! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Hanson ducks a wild right hand. CM Punk can barely stand. Here it comes - Lady of the Lake. 1....2...3, it's finished.

WINNER: Hank Hanson

We see a limo pulling up backstage..and..oh my god, is that Phillip Phillips?

Cole Scorpio and Chris Benoit vs Chris Jericho and Ryan Savage.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Doctor Bomb and Savage is hurt. Tag between Ryan Savage and Chris Jericho. Hard impact Russian Leg Sweep by Benoit. According to some other reviewers around here, 'legsweep' is one word. Tag to Cole Scorpio. Cole Scorpio uses a running dropkick into the corner. Tag between Chris Jericho and Ryan Savage. Flying elbow off the top rope by Cole Scorpio, followed by a flying knee to the face, which knocks Ryan to the ground. Ryan Savage gets locked in the Scorpio Lock! Submission victory! As quickly as that, the Scorpio Lock can strike!

Randy Reaume vs Randy Orton.

Match Background: This match is for the WWE Intercontinental title.

The Match: Randy Reaume kicks the leg, knocks Orton down, and goes to work on it. Randy Orton reverses a hip toss. Randy takes a headbutt from Randy Orton. The referee bumps after catching a wild right hand and is down. Randy Orton scores with a big spinebuster. Cover, but there's no one to count for Randy Orton! Randy Reaume pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. THERE IT IS! A legdrop to the BACK OF THE HEAD! I swear, that makes any match just a little bit better. I don't mind telling you that every time I see it, that's for sure. Randy crushes Orton with a huge legdrop. Covers for a quick two count. Back heel kick off the second rope, Orton goes down. Pin, but Orton is out just before the three count. Randy charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Massive backbreaker on Randy and I get happy flashbacks to Bret Hart's Five Moves of DOOM. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Randy Orton misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. Randy Reaume has Randy Orton down on the canvas. Anaconda Vice!!! Randy Orton taps out! Randy Reaume remains in the ring, celebrating the victory.

WINNER: Randy Reaume

Randy Reaume is walking backstage when he is spotted by Ryan Savage, who attacks. They brawl around the arena for a while, until Ryan Savage gets a clear upper hand and sends Randy into retreat.

Phillip Phillips vs Eddie Guerrero.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Phillip Phillips strikes Eddie. Eddie reverses a Phillip Phillips hammerlock. Lightning kick by Eddie on Phillip. Diamond Dust from Eddie Guerrero and Phillip is out! Eddie Guerrero gets a roll-up...and grabs a handful of tights as well! The referee doesn't see it: 1....2...3!! I don't think the fight has finished. Phillip Phillips and Eddie have begun brawling again! They wind up brawling all the way down the aisle and out of view.

WINNER: Eddie Guerrero

Aidan Raider vs Undertaker.

Match Background: This will be a hardcore bout.

The Match: Raider hits a face jam on Undertaker onto a chair! There's a two count on the pin. Flying elbow off the top rope by Aidan Raider, getting as close to zero air as possible. Covers for a quick two count. Undertaker pushes out of a Aidan Raider hold. Rude Awakening neckbreaker on Aidan Raider by Undertaker. Remember when that was a legit finish? Face jam onto the table. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Undertaker charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Flying elbow off the top rope by Aidan Raider, getting as close to zero air as possible. There's a two count on the pin. Undertaker avoids a Aidan Raider avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Death valley driver (not to be confused with the DVD 500) by Undertaker connects and Aidan Raider is down! Undertaker moves in for the kill. Here it comes - Last Ride. 1....2...3, it's finished. Undertaker gives a murderous look toward Aidan Raider...and attacks! Raider gets dropped to the canvas, then battered with a barrage of rights and lefts. Undertaker leaves the ring having left Raider down and out.

WINNER: The Undertaker

Hank Hanson vs Johnny Stamboli.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Johnny Stamboli with a spinning neckbreaker on Hanson. Spear by Johnny Stamboli. Hooks the leg for a two count. Hanson flips out of a Johnny Stamboli bodyslam attempt. Hank Hanson gets back up now and snap suplexes Stamboli. Double leg takedown from Hank Hanson sets up a ground and pound in the middle of the ring. What the hell is this, UFC? Hooks the leg for a two count. Forward suplex from Hanson, but not done very well. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Stamboli takes a vertical suplex from Hank Hanson. Stamboli backdrops Hank Hanson out of a piledriver attempt. That took a lot out of Johnny Stamboli. Big piledriver on Hanson. Hooks the leg for a two count. Brutal sit out powerbomb on Hanson! Pin, but Hanson is out just before the three count. Bodyslam by Stamboli. Johnny Stamboli hits some punches. How generic. Hank Hanson is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Running clothesline from Hank Hanson was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Chin crusher by Hank Hanson, the execution wasn't great though. I'd like to see a good Chin Crusher, that just sounds devastating. Johnny Stamboli is in trouble. Lady of the Lake! Stamboli taps!

WINNER: Hank Hanson

Stephanie McMahon is walking backstage when Aidan Raider comes out of nowhere and puts his hand over her mouth. He drags her into a waiting car, and it speeds off into the night.

Edge vs Phillip Phillips vs Randy Orton.

Match Background: Triple Threat Elimination match for the Intercontinental title.

The Match: Trying to channel the spirit of Misawa, Edge ends up chanelling Lex Luger instead and nails a running forearm to the face, minus the steel plate, of course. Orton takes a headbutt from Edge. Phillip reverses a waistlock. Edge takes a hard, stinging chop from Phillip. One word: Ow. Spear by Randy Orton. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! BAAACK Body drop by Orton gets a bit of a pop from the crowd. Randy Orton pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Phillip \ Orton whip Edge into the ropes and hit a double backdrop. Phillip Phillips blasts Edge with a superkick. The ref gets into position, administers the three count, and it's over. Phillip Phillips pins Edge. Back heel kick from Phillip on Orton but it misses by miles. Orton reverses a waistlock. Massive lariat! Stan Hansen would approve. Hooks the leg for a two count. Phillip flips out of a Randy Orton bodyslam attempt. Phillip Phillips hits a shitty missile dropkick on Orton. Randy Reaume comes running down the aisle and into the ring! Randy Orton turns around. Randy Reaume drops Orton to the canvas. Randy Reaume quickly locks on the Anaconda Vice! Randy leaves the ring, the damage done! Cover gets three for Phillip Phillips, Orton got pinned.

WINNER (and still Intercontinental champion): Phillip Phillips

Aidan Raider vs John Cena.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Forearm to the face from Raider on Cena. A kick from Raider is delivered to the leg. A kick from Raider is delivered to the leg. There's a two count on the pin. Raider hits a soaring kick on Cena. Hooks the leg for a two count. John Cena once again takes the advantage after blocking a few punches and connecting with some forearms. Raider is a glutton for punishment and just continues to take it during this match. There's a two count on the pin. Nice piledriver on Raider. Cena drops an elbow...but Aidan Raider moves out of the way. Aidan Raider blasts Cena with a superkick. Aidan Raider gets a roll-up...and grabs a handful of tights as well! The referee doesn't see it: 1....2...3!!

WINNER: Aidan Raider

Cole Scorpio is walking backstage, when out of nowhere he gets grabbed and pulled behind some crates. We hear a crack, and someone's footsteps running off. The camera pans over, and Cole Scorpio is out cold on the floor, a monkey wrench lying next to him, with no sign of the attacker.

Dudley Boyz vs World's Greatest Tag Team.

Match Background: This will be a tables bout for the WWE Tag Team Titles.

The Match: Shelton Benjamin gets up and gives a Belly to belly suplex to Shelton. A Gut buster connects on D-Von and hits hard. Shelton Benjamin pulls Bubba onto the table for a piledriver, but he uses a backdrop to survive. Haas goes for a splash but D-Von puts the knees up. Big kick from D-Von staggers Shelton but that's about it. Dudley Boyz whip Shelton into the corner. D-Von Dudley whips Bubba Ray Dudley in for a hard clothesline to follow-up. Spinebuster by Bubba Ray Dudley. Bubba Ray Dudley pulls Haas onto the table for a powerbomb, but he uses a backdrop to get out of the predicament. Shelton blocks a punch. Massive backbreaker on Bubba and I get happy flashbacks to Bret Hart's Five Moves of DOOM. Shelton sets up the table, then grabs D-Von Dudley and hits a suplex through the table for the win.

WINNER: World's Greatest Tag Team

Cole Scorpio vs Randy Reaume.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Cole hits a short arm drag on Randy. Randy Reaume is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Randy hits a HARD spinning kick to the jaw. Cole reverses an irish whip...and Randy Reaume runs into the referee! Springboard dropkick from Randy Reaume. Nicely done. Cover, but there's no one to count for Randy Reaume! Cole powers out of a headlock. Randy Reaume takes a knee lift from Cole. *sigh* Running knee lifts always remind me of the late Curt Hennig. Cole tries to channel the power of Kawada, but ends up channeling the power of Trish Stratus instead by hitting a high kick on Randy Reaume. Hooks the leg for a two count. Cole Scorpio blasts Randy with a superkick. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Randy blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! Spinning bulldog in the corner and Cole is down! Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Cole Scorpio powers out of a Randy Reaume headlock. Phillip Phillips comes running down the aisle with a chair! Randy goes to irish whip Cole Scorpio into the ropes. Phillip prepares to swing the chair...but Cole Scorpio reverses! Phillip accidentally smacks Randy with a chair to the back! Cole Scorpio has Randy Reaume down on the canvas. Randy Reaume gets locked in the Scorpio Lock! Submission victory!

WINNER: Cole Scorpio

COPYRIGHT RCF
MONDAY NIGHT RAW

Mike Cole vs Chris Nowinski.

Match Background: Mike is making his debut at this show.

The Match: Nowinski receives some punishment by Mike Cole but with that horrid offense, we're the only ones truly being punished. Mike walks into a drop toe hold. Mike receives some punishment by Chris Nowinski but with that horrid offense, we're the only ones truly being punished. Chris Nowinski misses a clothesline...and takes out the referee accidentally! Chris Nowinski scores with a poor standing spinebuster. Hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! Mike pushes out of a Chris Nowinski hold. Nowinski takes a vertical suplex, but pops right back up. Mike Cole scores with a poor face jam on Chris Nowinski. Covers for a quick two count. Forward suplex from Mike, but not done very well. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Mike drops an elbow...but Chris Nowinski moves out of the way. Chris Nowinski hits a sloppy double axe handle off the top. Pin, but Mike is out just before the three count. Mike Cole elbows Chris Nowinski in the face to break a hammerlock. Chris Nowinski hooks up a suplex, but it is blocked. Mike scores with a low blow, then turns it into a small package! The referee didn't see the illegal blow! 1...2...3! Chris Nowinski got screwed out of the victory!

WINNER: Mike Cole

Edge vs Eddie Guerrero.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Edge slams Eddie Guerrero. Eddie reverses a waistlock. Eddie hits a HARD spinning kick to the jaw. Edge reverses an irish whip...and Eddie Guerrero runs into the referee! Tiger suplex on Edge. No Misawa references from me, I swear. Oh, dammit. Hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! Edge comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. Flying shoulder tackle by Edge sends Eddie CRASHING to the mat. Spear by Edge. Hooks the leg for a two count. Edge scores with a big spinebuster. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Edge gets taken down out of nowhere! Lightning kick by Eddie on Edge. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Edge counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Phillip Phillips just slid into the ring out of nowhere! Phillip has a chair, and drops Edge and Eddie with devastating blows, causing the referee to call for the bell. This match has been ruled a no contest! Phillip Phillips has grabbed a chair. Edge walks over...and gets floored with a hard shot. Eddie also takes a hard shot. Phillip has laid everybody out!

WINNER: No Contest

Hank Hanson and Chris Jericho vs Ryan Savage and Chris Benoit.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Chris Jericho takes a knee lift from Savage. *sigh* Running knee lifts always remind me of the late Curt Hennig. Ryan Savage uses a running dropkick into the corner. That was just...ugh. Hooks the leg for a two count. Savage tags out to Chris Benoit. Benoit \ Savage whip Jericho into the ropes and hit a double backdrop. A Gut buster connects on Jericho and hits hard. Covers for a quick two count. Back suplex on Jericho. Chris Jericho powers out of a Chris Benoit headlock. Vicious chokeslam byChris Jericho! I'd compare it to Akira Taue, but then that would start another argument on the TSM Forums. Tag between Chris Jericho and Hank Hanson. Weak bodyslam on Benoit by Hanson sets up a legdrop. Hank Hanson scores with a face jam on Chris Benoit. Benoit flips out of a Hank Hanson bodyslam attempt. Tag to Ryan Savage. Ryan Savage hits a shitty missile dropkick on Hanson. Ryan Savage with an enziguri. Pin, but Hanson is out just before the three count. Savage hits a short arm drag on Hanson. Savage drops an elbow...but Hank Hanson moves out of the way. Sloppy short range spear from Hank Hanson. Ryan Savage can barely stand. Lady of the Lake! Savage taps!

WINNER: Hank Hanson

Randy Orton vs Matt Hardy Version 1.0.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Orton takes a flying neckbreaker from Matt Hardy Version 1.0. Spear by Matt Hardy Version 1.0. There's a two count on the pin. Orton blocks a punch. Orton slams Matt Hardy Version 1.0. Rude Awakening neckbreaker on Matt Hardy Version 1.0 by Orton. Remember when that was a legit finish? There's a two count on the pin. Death valley driver (not to be confused with the DVD 500) by Randy Orton connects and Matt Hardy Version 1.0 is down! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Matt Hardy Version 1.0 charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Matt flips out of a Randy Orton bodyslam attempt. Gutwrench into a powerbomb, aka the Doctor Bomb and Orton hits hard. Covers for a quick two count. High Angle DDT by Matt Hardy Version 1.0 just SPIKES Randy Orton down! Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Matt hits a dropkick on Randy Orton and gets right back up. Orton walks into a high dropkick from Matt Hardy Version 1.0, almost losing several teeth in the process. Orton counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Orton slams Matt Hardy Version 1.0 down and motions to the crowd. Death valley driver by Randy Orton! No one executes that move properly anymore. Matt Hardy Version 1.0 can barely stand. RKO!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!! Randy Orton gives a murderous look toward Matt Hardy Version 1.0...and attacks! Matt gets dropped to the canvas, then battered with a barrage of rights and lefts. Orton leaves the ring having left Matt down and out.

WINNER: Randy Orton

Bubba Ray Dudley vs Kane.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Kane is a glutton for punishment and just continues to take it during this match. STIFF~! chop lights up Kane who covers up to try and stop the agonizing PAIN! Flying shoulder tackle by Bubba sends Kane CRASHING to the mat. Running knee lift from Bubba Ray Dudley. Kane once again takes the advantage after blocking a few punches and connecting with some forearms. Running knee lift from Kane. Kane hits a bulldog off the ropes. There's a two count on the pin. Bubba Ray Dudley avoids a Kane avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Massive backbreaker on Kane and I get happy flashbacks to Bret Hart's Five Moves of DOOM. There's a two count on the pin. Bubba Ray Dudley scores with a big spinebuster. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Bubba drops an elbow...but Kane moves out of the way. Bubba takes a headbutt from Kane. Kane charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Bubba Ray Dudley with a spinning neckbreaker on Kane. Kane is in trouble. Bubba Cutter!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

WINNER: Bubba Ray Dudley

Aidan Raider vs CM Punk.

Match Background: None.

The Match: CM Punk hits a rolling kick on Raider. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. Flying reverse elbow by CM Punk. There's a two count on the pin. Raider backdrops CM Punk out of a piledriver attempt. That took a lot out of Aidan Raider. A kick from Raider is delivered to the leg. Raider hits a soaring kick on Punk. There's a two count on the pin. Aidan Raider with an enziguri. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Raider hits a dropkick on CM Punk. Actually, it barely touched! Punk flips out of a Aidan Raider bodyslam attempt. Raider takes a NICE hurrancarana from CM Punk. Covers for a quick two count. Tor-NADO DDT from CM Punk, Raider got planted! Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. CM Punk hits a rolling kick on Raider. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. CM Punk connects with a HARD right hand, sending the opponent down to the mat again. Raider counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Aidan Raider arm drags Punk over and locks on an armbar. Aidan Raider with an enziguri. Aidan Raider moves in for the kill. Twist of Fate! 1....2....3.


WINNER: Aidan Raider

Basham Brothers vs Flair and Batista.

Match Background: Flair and Batista are the reigning World Tag Team champions.

The Match: Wack kick from Batista. Weak bodyslam on Danny by Batista sets up a legdrop. Flapjack from Batista on Danny. Danny tags out to Doug Basham. STIFF~! chop lights up Batista who covers up to try and stop the agonizing PAIN! Batista fights out of a grapple. Batista hits a right hand on Doug Basham and follows it up with a couple more. Tag between Batista and Ric Flair. Flair and Batista hook up Basham, then hit a double suplex. Ric Flair DDTs Basham, but it just looked terrible. Ric Flair scores with a poor standing spinebuster. Flair tags out to Batista. Doug Basham is in trouble. Sit-Out Powerbomb!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

WINNER: Batista & Ric Flair

Cole Scorpio, John Cena, and Goldberg vs Randy Reaume, Phillip Phillips, and The Rock.

Match Background: Phillip Phillips is the reigning WWE Intercontinental champion, and has been since 03 May 2012.

The Match: Cena slams Randy Reaume. Fallaway slam by John Cena puts down Randy Reaume. Cena tags out to Goldberg. Weak slam from Goldberg sets Randy for something, but if it was as weak as that slam, then Randy has no worries. Goldberg hits a stump piledriver on Randy Reaume. Hooks the leg for a two count. Tag between Goldberg and Cole Scorpio. Goldberg \ Cole whip Randy into the ropes and hit a double backdrop. Cole hits an arm drag on Randy, follows it up with about 3 more and locks in an armbar for good measure. Cole Scorpio misses a clothesline. Randy hits a dropkick on Cole Scorpio and gets right back up. Tag to Phillip Phillips. Phillip hits a soaring kick on Cole. Phillip face jams Cole Scorpio. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Face crusher from Phillip on Cole sets up for an elbowdrop. Tag to The Rock. Rock slams Cole Scorpio. Bodyslam by Rock. Cole Scorpio avoids a Rock avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Tag to John Cena. John Cena with a spinning neckbreaker on Rock. Tag between The Rock and Randy Reaume. Standing leg lariat by Randy Reaume on Cena. Super kick by Randy Reaume. Randy Reaume floors John Cena. Here it comes...Anaconda Vice! John Cena taps!

WINNERS: Randy Reaume, Phillip Phillips, and The Rock

AJ Styles vs Billy Kidman.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Kidman just WAFFLES Styles with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! Styles ducks a wild right hand. AJ Styles connects with a back heel kick on Kidman and gets back up quickly. The referee bumps after catching a wild right hand and is down. Kidman walks into a face crusher variation. Has anyone's face ever really been crushed by one though? Cover, but there's no one to count for AJ Styles! Billy Kidman elbows AJ Styles in the face to break a hammerlock. Second rope flying axe handle, Styles goes down. One day, Kidman might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Kidman crushes Styles with a huge legdrop. There's a two count on the pin. Springboard dropkick from Billy Kidman. Nicely done. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Styles ducks a wild right hand. Lightning kick by Styles on Kidman. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Billy Kidman elbows AJ Styles in the face to break a hammerlock. AJ Styles gets knocked to the ground by Kidman, who is already climbing the turnbuckle. Shooting Star Press!!! 1....2....3!! It's all over.

WINNER: Billy Kidman

Charlie Haas vs Hank Hanson.

Match Background: None.

The Match: A weak headbutt on Haas by Hanson causes nothing but pain for both. Hank Hanson gets back up now and snap suplexes Haas. Right hand from Hanson on Haas. Haas tastes a high angle back suplex. If Spike Lee can sue TNN over the Spike TV nonsense, then Kurt Angle should be able to sue SOMEONE for that. Haas reverses a Hank Hanson hammerlock. Hanson takes a flying neckbreaker from Charlie Haas. Reverse DDT on Hanson. Covers for a quick two count. Haas drops an elbow...but Hank Hanson moves out of the way. Hank Hanson scores with a poor face jam on Charlie Haas. Hooks the leg for a two count. Forward suplex from Hanson. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Charlie Haas powers out of a Hank Hanson headlock. Charlie Haas hits some punches. How generic. Hank Hanson pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Hank Hanson snap suplexes Haas HARD to the canvas! And again! A pair of clotheslines follow and...yep, Hanson is now a bonifide HOUSE...EN...FUEGO~! Charlie Haas can barely stand. Lady of the Lake! Haas taps!

WINNER: Hank Hanson

Booker T vs Christian.

Match Background: None.

The Match: A Gut buster connects on Booker and hits hard. Reverse DDT on Booker. Hooks the leg for a two count. Christian misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. STIFF~! chop lights up Christian who covers up to try and stop the agonizing PAIN! Christian charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. There's a two count on the pin. Booker T scores with a standing spinebuster. Pin, but Christian is out just before the three count. Christian charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Christian comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. Big piledriver on Booker. There's a two count on the pin. Brutal sit out powerbomb on Booker! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Big dropkick by Christian, who got a ton of air on the move. Booker gets caught with a belly to belly suplex from Christian! Booker kicks Christian in the gut to reverse the momentum. Rude Awakening neckbreaker on Christian by Booker. Remember when that was a legit finish? Spear! Christian is down! Booker whips Christian into the turnbuckles...and the ref is crushed! Christian floors Booker, then signals for the Unprettier. Meanwhile, Booker T has something in his hands. Christian comes over...and gets nailed with a set of brass knuckles! The referee wakes up to see the pinfall: 1....2....3! It's over.

Winner: Booker T

Randy Orton vs Phillip Phillips vs CM Punk vs Edge.

Match Background: This will be for the Intercontinental Championship.

The Match: Phillip hits a short arm drag on Orton. Phillip hits a soaring kick on Orton. Covers for a quick two count. Phillip goes for a splash but Orton puts the knees up. Orton tags out to Edge. Running knee lift from Edge. The ref is bumped, as goes down after accidentally getting caught by an elbow to the face. High Angle DDT by Edge just SPIKES Phillip Phillips down! Pinfall attempt, but the ref is out and can't count to three! Phillip Phillips charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Phillip Phillips comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. Tag to CM Punk. Punk crushes Edge with a huge legdrop. Implant DDT by CM Punk! I will always and forever mark out for that move. Punk goes for a splash but Edge puts the knees up. Flying shoulder tackle by Edge sends Punk CRASHING to the mat. Massive lariat! Stan Hansen would approve. Tag between Edge and Phillip Phillips. Phillip hits a dropkick on CM Punk. Actually, it barely touched! Phillip Phillips with an enziguri. Randy Reaume comes running down the aisle and onto the apron! Punk turns...and is dropped throat-first onto the top rope by Randy! Randy Reaume has left Punk in big trouble. Phillip Phillips moves in for the kill. Here it comes - Phillips Screwdriver. 1....2...3, it's finished.

WINNER: Phillip Phillips

Chris Jericho and Jacob Wolfe vs Chris Benoit and Aidan Raider.

Match Background: Jacob Wolfe is the reigning WWE United States champion, and has been since 27 May 2012.

The Match: Jacob walks into a spinning heel kick which almost causes a decapitation! Back heel kick from Raider on Jacob. There's a two count on the pin. Tag between Aidan Raider and Chris Benoit. Benoit \ Raider whip Jacob into the ropes and hit a double back elbow. Benoit drives a thrust kick into the chest of Jacob. Covers for a quick two count. Chris Benoit snap suplexes Jacob. Jacob ducks a wild right hand. Jacob Wolfe turns Benoit inside-out with a clothesline. Reminds me of Willow's 'Bored Now' skin ripping finisher. Inside joke, don't worry about it. Tag to Chris Jericho. Second rope flying axe handle, Benoit goes down. One day, Jericho might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Lightning kick by Jericho on Benoit. Benoit counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Tag to Aidan Raider. Aidan Raider hits a shitty missile dropkick on Jericho. Slingshot clothesline by Raider, who almost messed it up by slipping on the ropes. Pin, but Jericho is out just before the three count. Chris Jericho gets hip tossed by Raider. Aidan Raider misses a clothesline. SUPER frankensteiner on Raider, who hit hard. Aidan Raider gets knocked to the ground by Jericho. Walls of Jericho!!! Aidan Raider taps out!

WINNERS: Chris Jericho & Jacob Wolfe

Ryan Savage vs The UnAmericans

The Match: Dropkick connects to the butt of the jaw and Savage goes down. Savage tastes a high angle back suplex. If Spike Lee can sue TNN over the Spike TV nonsense, then Kurt Angle should be able to sue SOMEONE for that. Christian scoops up Savage. Storm bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Covers for a quick two count. Tiger suplex on Savage. No Misawa references from me, I swear. Oh, dammit. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Storm and Christian whip Savage into the ropes and hit a double clothesline. Lance Storm is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Flying elbow off the top rope by Ryan Savage, getting as close to zero air as possible. Pin, but Christian is out just before the three count. Lance Storm pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Storm hits a dropkick on Ryan Savage and gets right back up. Lance Storm scoops up Savage. Christian bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. There's a two count on the pin. Savage blocks a kick from Lance Storm. Flying knee to the face from Ryan Savage. For the record it was more of a Rusty Wizard than a Shining one. Lance Storm grabs Ryan Savage from behind and shoves him into the ropes, then scores with a roll-up...but Savage rolls through with the move! He is using the tights for leverage! 1....2...3! The referee didn't see it!

WINNER: Ryan Savage

Mark Henry vs Matt Redd.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Henry takes a snap suplex from Matt Redd. Henry takes a back suplex. Mark Henry walks into a chop to the pecs. Ouchy. Matt Redd uses an armbreaker to take Henry down and applies an armbar. There's no quit in Henry yet though. Redd charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Boring brawling from Mark Henry is the cure for insomnia. Henry hits a stump piledriver on Matt Redd. Covers for a quick two count. Mark Henry misses a clothesline. BRUTAL forearm by Redd, the operative word being brutal. There's a two count on the pin. Forward suplex from Redd, but not done very well. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Mark Henry fights out of a grapple. Mark Henry punches away at Matt Redd only to get the tides turned quickly. Redd kicks Mark Henry in the gut to reverse the momentum. Flying elbow from Matt Redd, grazing the target slightly. Matt Redd moves in for the kill. DDT!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

WINNER: Matt Redd

Randy Reaume vs Cole Scorpio.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Randy just WAFFLES Cole with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! STIFF high kick on Cole by Randy Reaume. Randy hits a dropkick on Cole Scorpio and gets right back up. Randy Reaume hits a rolling kick on Cole. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. Cole Scorpio avoids a Randy Reaume avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Randy takes a hard, stinging chop from Cole. One word: Ow. Badly executed second rope splash by Cole. Hooks the leg for a two count. Randy Reaume avoids a Cole Scorpio avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Super kick by Randy Reaume. Hooks the leg for a two count. Springboard dropkick from Randy Reaume. Nicely done. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Cole pushes out of a Randy Reaume hold. Randy takes a chop from Cole. Randy powers out of a headlock. Implant DDT by Randy Reaume! I will always and forever mark out for that move. Randy Reaume signals for the Anaconda Vice! Phillip Phillips comes out of the crowd! He grabs a steel chair, runs into the ring, and rams the chair into the referee's gut, forcing the DQ. Meanwhile, Randy Reaume gets sent crashing into the ring post! I don't think the fight has finished. Randy Reaume and Cole have begun brawling again! They wind up brawling all the way down the aisle and out of view.

WINNER: No Contest

Ryan Savage vs Randy Orton.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Savage gets slammed down hard and winces in pain. Fallaway slam by Randy Orton puts down Ryan Savage. Nice piledriver on Savage. Massive lariat! Stan Hansen would approve. Randy Orton moves in for the kill. Here it comes - RKO. 1....2...3, it's finished.

WINNER: Randy Orton

CM Punk vs Chuck Palumbo.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Punk just WAFFLES Palumbo with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! Chuck Palumbo is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Punk hits a punch, but takes one right back. Again! A slugfest erupts in the ring! CM Punk charges, Palumbo moves, and the referee is knocked silly! Chuck Palumbo turns Punk inside-out with a clothesline. Reminds me of Willow's 'Bored Now' skin ripping finisher. Inside joke, don't worry about it. Cover, but there's no one to count for Chuck Palumbo! Punk blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! CM Punk hits a rolling kick on Palumbo. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. Punk crushes Palumbo with a huge legdrop. There's a two count on the pin. Power drive elbow by CM Punk. That sounds like a feature on a 4 x 4, doesn't it. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Chuck Palumbo comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. Powerslam from Chuck Palumbo on Punk. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Punk counters a sleeper with a jaw breaker and is able to get free! CM Punk floors Chuck Palumbo. Devil Lock!!! Chuck Palumbo taps out!

WINNER: C.M. Punk

John Cena vs Hank Hanson.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Spear by John Cena. Hanson reverses an irish whip...and John Cena runs into the referee! Hank Hanson knocks Cena to the outside, then signals for the Lady of the Lake. He reaches out of the ring for John Cena...and gets clobbered with the ring bell! Right to the head! The referee wakes up to see Cena sliding in and making the pinfall: 1....2....3! Forget about it.

WINNER: John Cena

Chris Benoit vs Goldberg.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Weak slam from Goldberg sets Benoit for something, but if it was as weak as that slam, then Benoit has no worries. Goldberg DDTs Benoit in a move that is so poorly executed, you can actually see that Chris Benoit's head didn't touch the mat at all. Covers for a quick two count. Goldberg drops an elbow...but Chris Benoit moves out of the way. Goldberg just WALKS into a stiff lariat clothesline from Benoit. Goldberg tastes a high angle back suplex. If Spike Lee can sue TNN over the Spike TV nonsense, then Kurt Angle should be able to sue SOMEONE for that. Covers for a quick two count. NASTY Tiger Suplex by Chris Benoit on Goldberg. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Big dropkick by Chris Benoit, who got a ton of air on the move. Goldberg reverses a Chris Benoit hammerlock. BIG clothesline from Goldberg. 'BIG' because it missed by a mile! Covers for a quick two count. Goldberg scores with a shitty standing spinebuster. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Goldberg hits a weak elbow on Chris Benoit. Uninspiring brawling from Goldberg. Check them brawlin' stats, boy. Benoit counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Hard impact Russian Leg Sweep by Benoit. According to some other reviewers around here, 'legsweep' is one word. Chris Benoit nearly kills Goldberg with a released tiger suplex. Chris Benoit has Goldberg down on the canvas. Goldberg gets locked in the Crippler Crossface! Submission victory!

WINNER: Chris Benoit

Raven vs Aidan Raider.

Match Background: Raven is making his debut at this show. He also works for NWATNA and RoH.

The Match: Running knee lift from Raven. Spear by Raven. Hooks the leg for a two count. Raven goes for a splash but Raider puts the knees up. Raider hits a quick kick on Raven. Raider hits a soaring kick on Raven. Hooks the leg for a two count. Aidan Raider blasts Raven with a superkick. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Raven walks into a spinning heel kick which almost causes a decapitation! Raven comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. Spinebuster by Raven. Covers for a quick two count. Powerbomb on Raider. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Running knee lift from Raven. Raven slams Aidan Raider. Aidan Raider pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Flying elbow from Aidan Raider, grazing the target slightly. Swan dive headbutt from Raider but without much elevation on the move. Raven grabs Aidan Raider from behind and shoves him into the ropes, then scores with a roll-up...but Raider rolls through with the move! He is using the tights for leverage! 1....2...3! The referee didn't see it!

WINNER: Aidan Raider

Triple H vs Brock Lesnar.

Match Background: Triple H is the reigning World Heavyweight champion.

The Match: Flying shoulder tackle by Lesnar sends HHH CRASHING to the mat. Brock Lesnar hits a bulldog off the ropes. Covers for a quick two count. HHH kicks Brock Lesnar in the gut to reverse the momentum. Uninspired brawling from Triple H. Brock Lesnar takes a right hand to the temple from HHH. There's a two count on the pin. Flapjack from HHH on Lesnar. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Lesnar takes a vertical suplex, but pops right back up. Triple H misses a clothesline. Lesnar hits a piledriver on Triple H. That used to end matches, you know. There's a two count on the pin. Brutal sit out powerbomb on HHH! Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. BIG clothesline on HHH. Brock Lesnar connects with a HARD right hand, sending the opponent down to the mat again. HHH blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! Triple H with a badly-executed spinning neckbreaker on Lesnar. One more performed that badly and this match will end on a bad note, if you get my drift. Triple H scores with a poor standing spinebuster. The two competitors end up in the corner, grappling. The referee tries to break them up, but HHH pushes him away. The ref tries again, and this time Lesnar is the one to shove the referee away...and that prompts a double DQ decision from the referee!

WINNER: Double Disqualification

The Rock vs Undertaker.

Match Background: This will be a tables bout.

The Match: Rock hits a right hand. The Rock pulls Undertaker onto the table for a piledriver, but he uses a backdrop to survive. BAAACK Body drop by Undertaker gets a bit of a pop from the crowd. Undertaker charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Undertaker avoids a The Rock avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Undertaker pulls Rock onto the table for a powerbomb, but he uses a backdrop to get out of the predicament. Spinebuster by Undertaker. Undertaker drops an elbow...but The Rock moves out of the way. Rock hits a piledriver on Undertaker. That used to end matches, you know. High Angle DDT by The Rock just SPIKES Undertaker down! Undertaker is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Undertaker hits some punches. How generic. Rock reverses a Undertaker hammerlock. Bodyslam by Rock. Rock climbs onto the table with Undertaker and uses a powerslam to break the table for the win!

WINNER: The Rock

Randy Reaume and Phillip Phillips vs The Cole Coalition vs A.P.A. vs World's Greatest Tag Team.

Match Background: This will be an elimination bout. Cole Scorpio and Mike Cole have given their team name 'The Cole Coalition'. A.P.A. are one of the most experienced teams in the promotion. This match is for the WWE Tag Team titles.

The Match: Phillip Phillips arm drags Cole over and locks on an armbar. Back heel kick from Phillip on Cole but it misses by miles. Tag between Phillip Phillips and Farooq. Weak bodyslam on Cole by Farooq sets up a legdrop. A weak headbutt on Cole by Farooq causes nothing but pain for both. Farooq tags out to Bradshaw. Cole Scorpio takes a right hand to the temple from Bradshaw. I bet those hurt more than Sgt. Slaughter's Noogies. Bradshaw slams Cole Scorpio down. Cole is sure in trouble now. Cole Scorpio comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. Cole hits an arm drag on Bradshaw, follows it up with about 3 more and locks in an armbar for good measure. Tag to Mike Cole. Ugly-looking short powerbomb by Mike. ONE...TWO...THREE. Mike defeats Bradshaw. Shelton Benjamin with a spinning neckbreaker on Mike. Shelton Benjamin plants Mike with an EXPLODAH~! suplex. Pin, but Mike is out just before the three count. Tag between Shelton Benjamin and Charlie Haas. Shelton Benjamin scoops up Mike. Haas bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Spear by Charlie Haas. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Mike Cole pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Tag to Randy Reaume. Second rope flying axe handle, Haas goes down. One day, Randy might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Tiger suplex on Haas. No Misawa references from me, I swear. Oh, dammit. Tag to Phillip Phillips. Randy \ Phillip hook up Haas, then hit a double suplex. ONE...TWO...THREE. Phillip defeats Haas. Cole takes a hard, stinging chop from Phillip. One word: Ow. Back heel kick from Phillip on Cole. Cole counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Cole hits a spinning back kick. All those spinning kicks look alike, don't they. Cole Scorpio uses a running dropkick into the corner. That was just...ugh. There's a two count on the pin. Tag to Mike Cole. Suplex into a front slam from Mike, but the execution was CRAPTASTIC~!. Phillip counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Tag between Phillip Phillips and Randy Reaume. Vicious kick to the teeth from Randy Reaume. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Flying elbow from Randy Reaume connects. Mike kicks Randy Reaume in the gut to reverse the momentum. Randy takes a chop from Mike. Cole Scorpio moves in for the kill. Scorpio Bomb! 1....2....3.

WINNER: The Cole Coalition

I beat the Nevermore.

Dark Angel vs Chris Benoit.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Stun Gun from Dark Angel! I still can't believe that was Austin's finisher at one point. Spear by Dark Angel. There's a two count on the pin. Benoit blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! Benoit drives a HARD forearm into the chest of DA. A Gut buster connects on DA and hits hard. Covers for a quick two count. Blind lariat by Benoit was downright NASTY! DA never...saw...it coming! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Stun Gun from Chris Benoit! I still can't believe that was Austin's finisher at one point. Benoit walks into a drop toe hold. Spinebuster by Dark Angel. Covers for a quick two count. Dark Angel scores with a big spinebuster. Pin, but Benoit is out just before the three count. Running knee lift from Dark Angel. Benoit takes a back suplex. Dark Angel gets taken down out of nowhere! Chris Benoit snap suplexes DA HARD to the canvas! And again! A pair of clotheslines follow and...yep, Benoit is a HOUSE...EN...FUEGO~! Emerald Fusion by Chris Benoit on DA! Chris Benoit has Dark Angel down on the canvas. Dark Angel gets locked in the Crippler Crossface! Submission victory! Chris Benoit offers a handshake to DA...and he accepts it! No! Dark Angel levels Benoit with a cheap shot right hand! Dark Angel spins Benoit around. Dark Angel hits the Heaven to Hell! Chris Benoit has been floored after the match.

WINNER: Chris Benoit

Chris Jericho vs Eddie Guerrero.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Jericho hits a HARD spinning kick to the jaw. Chris Jericho connects with a back heel kick on Eddie and gets back up quickly. Spin kick by Chris Jericho to the face sends the opponent FLYING across the ring. Spin kick by Chris Jericho to the face sends the opponent FLYING across the ring. Eddie Guerrero elbows Chris Jericho in the face to break a hammerlock. Jericho takes a flying neckbreaker from Eddie Guerrero. SUPER frankensteiner on Jericho, who hit hard and is loopy as a result. There's a two count on the pin. Eddie goes for a splash but Jericho puts the knees up. VICIOUS lightning kick by Jericho on Eddie. Covers for a quick two count. BURNING HAMMER~! from Chris Jericho is executed with perfect brutally! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Eddie reverses a waistlock. Eddie Guerrero strikes Jericho. Jericho kicks Eddie Guerrero in the gut to reverse the momentum. Second rope flying axe handle, Eddie goes down. One day, Jericho might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Chris Jericho has Eddie Guerrero down on the canvas. Here it comes...Lion Tamer! Eddie Guerrero taps! Chris Jericho goes into the crowd, where he celebrates his victory

WINNER: Chris Jericho

La Resistance vs The Cole Coalition.

Match Background: This match is for the WWE Tag Team titles. Cole Scorpio is the reigning World Heavyweight champion, and has been since 24 June 2012. The Cole Coalition have been WWE Tag Team champions since 18 June 2012.

The Match: Sylvan Grenier strikes Mike Cole with a hard blow. Weak bodyslam by Grenier. There's a two count on the pin. Tag between Sylvan Grenier and Rene Dupree. La Resistance hook up Mike, then hit a double suplex. Mike Cole charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Hooks the leg for a two count. Mike gets slammed down hard and winces in pain. Mike flips out of a Rene Dupree bodyslam attempt. Mike Cole scores with a poor standing spinebuster. Mike tags out to Cole Scorpio. Cole hits an arm drag on Dupree, follows it up with about 3 more and locks in an armbar for good measure. Back heel kick from Cole on Dupree. Rene Dupree is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Tag to Sylvan Grenier. Powerslam from Sylvan Grenier on Cole. Sylvan Grenier scores with a poor standing spinebuster. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Cole receives some punishment by Sylvan Grenier but with that horrid offense, we're the only ones truly being punished. Cole backdrops Sylvan Grenier out of a piledriver attempt. That took a lot out of Cole Scorpio. Cole Scorpio uses a running dropkick into the corner. That was just...ugh. Sylvan Grenier sets up Cole as the partner goes to ringside and gets a steel chair. Rene Dupree comes in and swings, but Cole Scorpio ducks and Sylvan Grenier gets blasted in the face with the chair instead! Cole Scorpio moves in for the kill. Scorpio Bomb! 1....2....3.

WINNER: The Cole Coalition


Triple H vs Tajiri.

Match Background: Tajiri is the reigning WWE Cruiserweight champion.

The Match: Running clothesline from Triple H was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Triple H hits a sloppy double axe handle off the top. Hooks the leg for a two count. Tajiri avoids a Triple H avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Dropkick connects to the butt of the jaw and HHH goes down. Implant DDT by Tajiri! I will always and forever mark out for that move. There's a two count on the pin. Back heel kick off the second rope, HHH goes down. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! BAAACK Body drop by HHH gets a bit of a pop from the crowd. HHH blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! Powerslam from Triple H on Tajiri. Hooks the leg for a two count. Sloppy discus punch from Triple H barely connects on Tajiri. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Running clothesline from Triple H was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Triple H hits Tajiri. Tajiri comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. THERE IT IS! A legdrop to the BACK OF THE HEAD! I swear, that makes any match just a little bit better. I don't mind telling you that every time I see it, that's for sure. Tiger suplex on HHH. No Misawa references from me, I swear. Oh, Bloody Hell! Triple H is in trouble. Here it comes - BUZZSAW KICK! 1....2...3, it's finished.

WINNER: Tajiri

The Rock vs Cole Scorpio.

Match Background: This match is for the World Heavyweight title.

The Match: Cole hits a short arm drag on Rock. Rock takes a chop from Cole. Face crusher from Cole on Rock sets up for an elbowdrop. Cole hits an arm drag on Rock, follows it up with about 3 more and locks in an armbar for good measure. Rock counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! BIG clothesline on Cole. The Rock hits a bulldog off the ropes. There's a two count on the pin. The Rock misses a clothesline. Back heel kick from Cole on Rock. Hooks the leg for a two count. Cole Scorpio with an enziguri. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Cole Scorpio misses a clothesline. The Rock hits some punches. How generic. Cole counters a sleeper with a jaw breaker and is able to get free! The Rock takes a knee lift from Cole. *sigh* Running knee lifts always remind me of the late Curt Hennig. Cole Scorpio moves in for the kill. Scorpio Bomb! 1....2....3. The Rock extends his hand to Cole...and it is accepted! They shake!

WINNER: Cole Scorpio

Billy Kidman vs Paul London.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Dropkick connects to the butt of the jaw and London goes down. STIFF high kick on London by Billy Kidman. Flying elbow from Billy Kidman connects. London takes a flying neckbreaker from Billy Kidman. Billy Kidman misses a clothesline. Paul London hits a rolling kick on Kidman. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. London crushes Kidman with a running senton. Hooks the leg for a two count. Kidman ducks a wild right hand. Lightning kick by Kidman on London. Covers for a quick two count. Diamond Dust from Billy Kidman and London is out! Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Paul London fights out of a grapple. Standing leg lariat by Paul London on Kidman. London walks into a drop toe hold. THERE IT IS! A legdrop to the BACK OF THE HEAD! I swear, that makes any match just a little bit better. I don't mind telling you that every time I see it, that's for sure. Paul London gets knocked to the ground by Kidman, who is already climbing the turnbuckle. Off the top - Shooting Star Press, forget about it. 1....2...3!

WINNER: Billy Kidman

Rikishi vs Ric Flair.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Ric Flair takes a right hand to the temple from Rikishi. Rikishi hits a sloppy double axe handle off the top. There's a two count on the pin. Flair kicks Rikishi in the gut to reverse the momentum. Rikishi hits a punch, but takes one right back. Again! A slugfest erupts in the ring! Running clothesline from Ric Flair was actually MIGHTY sloppy. Hooks the leg for a two count. Ric Flair turns Rikishi inside-out with a clothesline. Reminds me of Willow's 'Bored Now' skin ripping finisher. Inside joke, don't worry about it. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Rikishi takes a vertical suplex, but pops right back up. Rikishi reverses a hip toss. Big clothesline from Rikishi. Covers for a quick two count. Rikishi scores with a crappy looking standing spinebuster. Could have been done a hell of a lot better though. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Big kick from Rikishi staggers Flair but that's about it. A weak headbutt on Flair by Rikishi causes nothing but pain for both. Ric Flair reverses a hip toss. Weak bodyslam on Rikishi by Flair sets up a legdrop. Ric Flair scores with a crappy looking standing spinebuster. Could have been done a hell of a lot better though. Ric Flair floors Rikishi. Here it comes...Figure Four Leglock! Rikishi taps!

WINNER: Ric Flair

Chris Jericho vs Shawn Michaels.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Jericho drives a HARD forearm into the chest of HBK. Jericho just WAFFLES HBK with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! Hard back suplex on HBK. Come to think of it, that move had WAY too much power in No Mercy for N64. THERE IT IS! A legdrop to the BACK OF THE HEAD! I swear, that makes any match just a little bit better. I don't mind telling you that every time I see it, that's for sure. HBK blocks a punch. Spin kick by Shawn Michaels to the face sends the opponent FLYING across the ring. Spinebuster by Shawn Michaels. There's a two count on the pin. Shawn Michaels misses a clothesline. Superkick by Chris Jericho practically knocks out all of Shawn Michaels's teeth! Hooks the leg for a two count. SHINING WIZARD~! on HBK by Jericho! Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! HBK reverses a Chris Jericho hammerlock. Shawn Michaels kicks the leg, knocks Jericho down, and goes to work on it. Jericho pushes out of a Shawn Michaels hold. HBK takes a flying neckbreaker from Chris Jericho. The time limit expires, and the referee declares the match a draw. Shawn Michaels offers a handshake to Jericho...but he spits at Shawn Michaels and walks off!

WINNER: Time Limit Expired

Dark Angel vs Christian.

Match Background: This is a Vengeance Battle Royal Qualifying Match.

The Match: Dark Angel connects with a HARD right hand, sending the opponent down to the mat again. DA slams Christian. Dark Angel with a spinning neckbreaker on Christian. Bodyslam by DA. Christian pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Vertical suplex by Christian. Vicious back suplex! Dark Angel got nailed big time! Hooks the leg for a two count. DA counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Spear by Dark Angel. Hooks the leg for a two count. Dark Angel scores with a big spinebuster. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Christian counters a sleeper with a jaw breaker and is able to get free! Christian hits some punches. How generic. Dark Angel fights out of a grapple. Stun Gun from Dark Angel! I still can't believe that was Austin's finisher at one point. Christian can barely stand. Here it comes - Heaven to Hell. 1....2...3, it's finished.

WINNER: Dark Angel

Phillip Phillips vs Mike Cole.

Match Background: Phillip Phillips is the reigning WWE Intercontinental champion, and has been since 03 May 2012.

The Match: Phillip hits a short arm drag on Mike. Mike flips out of a Phillip Phillips bodyslam attempt. Mike strikes away at Phillip Phillips, not doing much damage at all. Mike Cole misses a clothesline...and takes out the referee accidentally! Mike Cole nearly ends the career of Phillip with a screwed up german suplex. GET AWAY FROM THE WRESTLING BUSINESS! Cover, but there's no one to count for Mike Cole! Phillip counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Face crusher from Phillip on Mike sets up for an elbowdrop. Badly executed second rope splash by Phillip. Covers for a quick two count. Slingshot clothesline by Phillip, who almost messed it up by slipping on the ropes. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Phillip Phillips misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. BRUTAL forearm by Mike, the operative word being brutal. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Mike walks into a drop toe hold. Mike Cole is in trouble. Here it comes - Phillips Screwdriver. 1....2...3, it's finished.

WINNER: Phillip Phillips

Randy Orton vs Eddie Guerrero.

The Match: Trying to channel the spirit of Misawa, Randy Orton ends up chanelling Lex Luger instead and nails a running forearm to the face, minus the steel plate, of course. Eddie Guerrero comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. Eddie Guerrero connects with a back heel kick on Orton and gets back up quickly. Randy Orton charges, Eddie moves, and the referee is knocked silly! Power drive elbow by Eddie Guerrero. That sounds like a feature on a 4 x 4, doesn't it. Cover, but there's no one to count for Eddie Guerrero! Orton counters a sleeper with a jaw breaker and is able to get free! Fallaway slam by Randy Orton puts down Eddie Guerrero. Spear by Randy Orton. There's a two count on the pin. Spear! Eddie is down! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Eddie pushes out of a Randy Orton hold. Super kick by Eddie Guerrero. Pin, but Orton is out just before the three count. Randy Orton elbows Eddie Guerrero in the face to break a hammerlock. Eddie Guerrero is in trouble. RKO! 1....2....3.

WINNER: Randy Orton

Cole Scorpio vs Ryan Savage.

Match Background: Cole Scorpio is the reigning World Heavyweight champion, and has been since 24 June 2012.

The Match: Forearm to the face from Savage on Cole. Ryan Savage misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. Flying elbow off the top rope by Cole Scorpio, getting as close to zero air as possible. Flying knee to the face from Cole Scorpio. For the record it was more of a Rusty Wizard than a Shining one. Ryan Savage is in trouble. Here it comes - Scorpio Bomb. 1....2...3, it's finished. Cole Scorpio is still in the ring celebrating. Ryan Savage pushes the referee away. Ryan Savage from behind..is strangling Cole Scorpio with something! The referees try to get him off as blood is already coming out of Cole's mouth..Savage gets off but gets out of the ring and puts a steel chair around Cole's neck, stomping it viciously and leaving the world champion laid out with blood trickling out of his mouth.

WINNER: Cole Scorpio

Billy Kidman vs Alex Jester.

Match Background: None.

The Match: AJ drives a thrust kick into the chest of Kidman. Doctor Bomb connects and Kidman landed hard. Covers for a quick two count. Alex Jester misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. AJ walks into a high dropkick from Billy Kidman, almost losing several teeth in the process. Kidman hits a dropkick on Alex Jester and gets right back up. Hooks the leg for a two count. DDT from the top rope by Billy Kidman. That looked KILLER. Pin, but AJ is out just before the three count. Second rope flying axe handle, AJ goes down. One day, Kidman might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. AJ blocks a kick from Billy Kidman. Tiger bomb by Alex Jester, which is nowhere near as cool as a botched Pedigree but gets the job done. Covers for a quick two count. Belly to belly off the top rope! Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Billy Kidman takes a butterfly suplex from AJ. AJ scoops and slams Billy Kidman. What's the difference between a scoop slam and a body slam anyway? Kidman reverses a waistlock. AJ takes a flying neckbreaker from Billy Kidman. Springboard dropkick from Billy Kidman. Nicely done. Billy Kidman floors Alex Jester...and climbs the turnbuckles. Through the air, Shooting Star Press! 1....2....3.

WINNER: Billy Kidman

CM Punk vs Brock Lesnar.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Lesnar scoops and slams CM Punk. What's the difference between a scoop slam and a body slam anyway? Brock Lesnar with a spinning neckbreaker on Punk. Lesnar hits a piledriver on CM Punk. That used to end matches, you know. Massive lariat! Stan Hansen would approve. Brock Lesnar moves in for the kill. F5!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

WINNER: Brock Lesnar

Booker T vs Eddie Guerrero.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Eddie Guerrero connects with a back heel kick on Booker and gets back up quickly. Eddie just WAFFLES Booker with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! Eddie Guerrero hits a rolling kick on Booker. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. Second rope flying axe handle, Booker goes down. One day, Eddie might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Booker T reverses a hip toss. BAAACK Body drop by Eddie gets a bit of a pop from the crowd. Spinebuster by Booker T. Hooks the leg for a two count. Eddie blocks a punch. Super kick by Eddie Guerrero. There's a two count on the pin. Diamond Dust from Eddie Guerrero and Booker is out! Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Booker reverses a Eddie Guerrero hammerlock. Booker T connects with rights and lefts and Eddie Guerrero is down! Eddie blocks a kick from Booker T. Eddie Guerrero hits a rolling kick on Booker. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. Booker T gets knocked to the ground by Eddie, who is already climbing the turnbuckle. Through the air, Frog Splash! 1....2....3.

WINNER: Eddie Guerrero

Big Show vs Chris Jericho.

Match Background: None.

The Match: STIFF high kick on Show by Chris Jericho. Dropkick connects to the butt of the jaw and Show goes down. Second rope flying axe handle, Show goes down. One day, Jericho might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Chris Jericho hits a rolling kick on Show. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. Jericho walks into a drop toe hold. Big Show strikes Chris Jericho. Show hits a stump piledriver on Chris Jericho. Hooks the leg for a two count. Jericho counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! SUPER frankensteiner on Show, who hit hard. Hooks the leg for a two count. SHINING WIZARD~! on Show by Jericho! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Show blocks a kick from Chris Jericho. Weak kick from Show. I am unpleased. Chris Jericho powers out of a Big Show headlock. Hard back suplex on Show. Come to think of it, that move had WAY too much power in No Mercy for N64. Big Show gets knocked to the ground by Jericho. CODEBREAKER! Jericho gets the 3!

WINNER: Chris Jericho

Randy Reaume and Phillip Phillips vs The Cole Coalition.

Match Background: Cole Scorpio is the reigning World Heavyweight champion, and has been since 24 June 2012. The Cole Coalition are the reigning WWE Tag Team champions, and have been since 18 June 2012. Phillip Phillips is the reigning WWE Intercontinental champion, and has been since 03 May 2012.

The Match: Mike Cole takes a knee lift from Phillip. *sigh* Running knee lifts always remind me of the late Curt Hennig. Back heel kick from Phillip on Mike. Tag to Randy Reaume. Second rope flying axe handle, Mike goes down. One day, Randy might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. There's a two count on the pin. Tor-NADO DDT from Randy Reaume, Mike got planted! Tag to Phillip Phillips. Randy \ Phillip whip Mike into the ropes and hit a double backdrop. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Mike counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Tag to Cole Scorpio. Phillip Phillips takes a knee lift from Cole. *sigh* Running knee lifts always remind me of the late Curt Hennig. Back heel kick from Cole on Phillip. Cole tags out to Mike Cole. Cole Scorpio scoops up Phillip. Mike bounces off the ropes and hits a flying Hart Attack clothesline. Mike just FLATTENS Phillip Phillips with a hard right hand! Mike Cole uses a running dropkick into the corner. That was just...ugh. Mike tags out to Cole Scorpio. Cole hits a dropkick on Phillip Phillips. Actually, it barely touched! Phillip Phillips fights out of a grapple. Tag between Phillip Phillips and Randy Reaume. Super kick by Randy Reaume. Randy Reaume gets whipped into the corner. Cole charges in, but into a pair of raised boots. Randy uses a roll up, with feet on the second rope! The referee hasn't seen it: 1....2....3!!

WINNER: Randy Reaume & Phillip Phillips

AJ Styles vs Big Show.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Big Show hits a weak elbow on AJ Styles. BIG clothesline from Show. 'BIG' because it missed by a mile! Hooks the leg for a two count. AJ Styles pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Show walks into a high dropkick from AJ Styles, almost losing several teeth in the process. Implant DDT by AJ Styles! I will always and forever mark out for that move. There's a two count on the pin. Vicious kick to the teeth from AJ Styles. Pin, but Show is out just before the three count. Show takes a flying neckbreaker from AJ Styles. Show kicks AJ Styles in the gut to reverse the momentum. Messed up bodyslam by Show almost kills Styles. Hooks the leg for a two count. Show DDTs AJ Styles. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Styles takes a couple of weak clotheslines. Some pretty weak shots by Show. Styles powers out of a headlock. Implant DDT by AJ Styles! I will always and forever mark out for that move. DDT from the top rope by AJ Styles. That looked KILLER. 1....2....3.

WINNER: AJ Styles

Tajiri vs Ultimo Dragon.

Match Background: This match is for the WWE Cruiserweight title.

The Match: STIFF high kick on Tajiri by Ultimo Dragon. Ultimo Dragon misses a clothesline. Ultimo walks into a high dropkick from Tajiri, almost losing several teeth in the process. Tajiri whips Ultimo into the turnbuckles...and the ref is crushed! Springboard dropkick from Tajiri. Nicely done. Cover, but there's no one to count for Tajiri! Ultimo counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Tajiri takes a flying neckbreaker from Ultimo Dragon. SUPER frankensteiner on Tajiri, who hit hard and is loopy as a result. Hooks the leg for a two count. Vicious kick to the teeth from Ultimo Dragon. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Tajiri avoids a Ultimo Dragon avalanche by getting out of the damn way! Superkick by Tajiri practically knocks out all of Ultimo Dragon's teeth! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Ultimo Dragon is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Tajiri can barely stand. Flipping Reverse DDT! 1....2....3.

WINNER: Ultimo Dragon

Mike Cole vs Jacob Wolfe.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Jacob Wolfe uses an armbreaker to take Mike down and applies an armbar. There's no quit in Mike yet though. Big clothesline from Jacob. Covers for a quick two count. Mike Cole is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Chop from Mike on Jacob causing the knock down. Mike Cole arm drags Jacob over and locks on an armbar. Covers for a quick two count. Mike face jams Jacob Wolfe. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Mike hits a dropkick on Jacob Wolfe. Actually, it barely touched! Mike charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Jacob hits a piledriver on Mike Cole. I know I wouldn't let someone that bad give me a piledriver. Covers for a quick two count. Forward suplex from Jacob. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Big kick from Jacob staggers Mike but that's about it. Mike takes a snap suplex from Jacob Wolfe. Mike Cole once again takes the advantage after blocking a few punches and connecting with some forearms. Mike Cole snap suplexes Jacob HARD to the canvas! And again! A pair of clotheslines follow and...yep, Mike is now a bonifide HOUSE...EN...FUEGO~! Forward suplex from Mike, but not done very well. Jacob Wolfe is in trouble. Here it comes - The Mikecator. 1....2...3, it's finished.

WINNER: Mike Cole

Kane vs The Rock.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Rock slams Kane. Rock slams Kane. BIG clothesline on Kane. Running knee lift from The Rock. Rock drops an elbow...but Kane moves out of the way. Kane with a spinning neckbreaker on Rock. Kane hits a bulldog off the ropes. There's a two count on the pin. Kane goes for a splash but Rock puts the knees up. Spear by The Rock. Covers for a quick two count. Brutal sit out powerbomb on Kane! Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Kane comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. Kane hits a right hand. Kane misses a clothesline. Kane charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. The Rock has Kane down on the canvas. Here it comes...Sharpshooter! Kane taps!

WINNER: The Rock

Shawn Michaels vs Chris Jericho.

Match Background: This will be a submission bout.

The Match: Spinning bulldog in the corner and Jericho is down! Jericho backdrops Shawn Michaels out of a piledriver attempt. That took a lot out of Chris Jericho. Dropkick connects to the butt of the jaw and HBK goes down. Flying elbow from Chris Jericho connects. THERE IT IS! A legdrop to the BACK OF THE HEAD! I swear, that makes any match just a little bit better. I don't mind telling you that every time I see it, that's for sure. Chris Jericho gets taken down out of nowhere! HBK crushes Jericho with a huge legdrop. Back heel kick off the second rope, Jericho goes down. HBK uses a basement dropkick to the knee and it looks like it might be TIME TO GO TO SCHOOL~! Jericho counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Flying elbow from Chris Jericho connects. Vicious chokeslam by Chris Jericho! I'd compare it to Akira Taue, but then that would start another argument on the TSM Forums. Chris Jericho has Shawn Michaels down...and locks in the Lion Tamer for the submission victory!

WINNER: Chris Jericho

Undertaker vs Kurt Angle.

Match Background: Kurt Angle is the reigning WWE World champion, and has been since 27 May 2012.

The Match: Kurt Angle charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Angle walks into a side slam. Think about how much talent it takes to side slam someone. Nash can do it. Covers for a quick two count. Angle flips out of a Undertaker bodyslam attempt. Angle drives a HARD forearm into the chest of Undertaker. Angle slams Undertaker down and motions to the crowd. There's a two count on the pin. Belly to back suicideplex, Undertaker got folded up big time. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. A Gut buster connects on Undertaker and hits hard. Kurt Angle misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. Full nelson slam on Angle. There's a two count on the pin. DEATH VALLEY DRIVAH~! by Undertaker just KILLS Kurt Angle! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Undertaker with a spinning neckbreaker on Angle. Trying to channel the spirit of Misawa, Undertaker ends up chanelling Lex Luger instead and nails a running forearm to the face, minus the steel plate, of course. Undertaker walks into a drop toe hold. Undertaker gets caught with a short powerbomb from Angle. Kurt Angle nearly kills Undertaker with a released tiger suplex. Kurt Angle floors Undertaker. Undertaker gets locked in the Angle Lock! Submission victory!

WINNER: Kurt Angle

Randy Reaume vs Cole Scorpio.

Match Background: Cole Scorpio is the reigning World Heavyweight champion, and has been since 24 June 2012.

The Match: Randy just WAFFLES Cole with a STIFF chop that hurt ME to watch! STIFF high kick on Cole by Randy Reaume. Implant DDT by Randy Reaume! I will always and forever mark out for that move. THERE IT IS! A legdrop to the BACK OF THE HEAD! I swear, that makes any match just a little bit better. I don't mind telling you that every time I see it, that's for sure. Randy Reaume misses a clothesline. Face crusher from Cole on Randy sets up for an elbowdrop. Back heel kick from Cole on Randy but it misses by miles. Hooks the leg for a two count. Randy Reaume powers out of a Cole Scorpio headlock. Lightning kick by Randy on Cole. There's a two count on the pin. Power drive elbow by Randy Reaume. That sounds like a feature on a 4 x 4, doesn't it. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Randy charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. Cole snapmares Randy Reaume and goes for the DREADED chinlock. Cole walks into a drop toe hold. Flying elbow from Randy Reaume connects. Mike Cole comes running down the aisle and into the ring! Cole Scorpio turns around. Mike Cole spins Cole around. Mike Cole hits the The Mikecator on Cole Scorpio!! What the hell is he doing!? Mike leaves the ring, the damage done! The ref gets into position, administers the three count, and it's over. Randy Reaume has pinned the World Champion!

WINNER: Randy Reaume

Randy Orton vs Mike Cole.

Match Background: Randy Orton is the reigning WWE Intercontinental champion, and has been since 23 September 2012.

The Match: Mike walks into a side slam. Think about how much talent it takes to side slam someone. Nash can do it. Death valley driver by Randy Orton! No one executes that move properly anymore. Randy Orton scores with a big spinebuster. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Flying shoulder tackle by Orton sends Mike CRASHING to the mat. Hooks the leg for a two count. Mike backdrops Randy Orton out of a piledriver attempt. That took a lot out of Mike Cole. Orton takes a hard, stinging chop from Mike. One word: Ow. Mike Cole scores with a face jam on Randy Orton. Orton counters an arm wringer with an elbow to the side of the head. Spinebuster by Randy Orton. The two competitors end up in the corner, grappling. The referee tries to break them up, but Orton pushes him away. The ref tries again, and this time Mike is the one to shove the referee away...and that prompts a double DQ decision from the referee!

WINNER: Double Disqualification

Dark Angel vs Goldust.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Double arm suplex by Dark Angel connects as Goldust hits hard. Goldust pushes out of a Dark Angel hold. Trying to channel the spirit of Misawa, Goldust ends up chanelling Lex Luger instead and nails a running forearm to the face, minus the steel plate, of course. Goldust misses a clothesline...and takes out the referee accidentally! DEATH VALLEY DRIVAH~! by Goldust just KILLS Dark Angel! Cover, but there's no one to count for Goldust! Dark Angel pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. Fallaway slam by Dark Angel puts down Goldust. Gutwrench into a powerbomb, aka the Doctor Bomb and Goldust hits hard. Covers for a quick two count. Death valley driver (not to be confused with the DVD 500) by Dark Angel connects and Goldust is down! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Goldust blocks the suplex attempt and is able to hit the suplex instead! Spear by Goldust. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Goldust misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. Goldust gets knocked to the ground by DA. Figure Four!!! Goldust taps out!

WINNER: Dark Angel

Phillip Phillips vs Batista.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Big kick from Batista staggers Phillip but that's about it. Batista hits a sloppy double axe handle off the top. Hooks the leg for a two count. Phillip blocks a punch. Phillip Phillips kicks the leg, knocks Batista down, and goes to work on it. THERE IT IS! A legdrop to the BACK OF THE HEAD! I swear, that makes any match just a little bit better. I don't mind telling you that every time I see it, that's for sure. Covers for a quick two count. DDT from the top rope by Phillip Phillips. That looked KILLER. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! Phillip uses a basement dropkick to the knee and it looks like it might be TIME TO GO TO SCHOOL~! Phillip Phillips gets taken down out of nowhere! Batista hits a piledriver on Phillip Phillips. I know I wouldn't let someone that bad give me a piledriver. Hooks the leg for a two count. Batista scores with a poor standing spinebuster. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Batista slams Phillip Phillips down. Phillip is sure in trouble now. Batista strikes Phillip Phillips. Batista charges into the corner but EATS BOOT. THERE IT IS! A legdrop to the BACK OF THE HEAD! I swear, that makes any match just a little bit better. I don't mind telling you that every time I see it, that's for sure. Batista walks into a face crusher variation. Has anyone's face ever really been crushed by one though? Batista can barely stand. Phillips Screwdriver! 1....2....3.

WINNER: Phillip Phillips

The Gods of Indie vs Team HHH.

Match Background: The Gods of Indie consists of Cole Scorpio, CM Punk, Bryan Danielson, Chris Sabin, and Colt Cabana. Team HHH consists of Triple H, John Cena, The Rock, Chris Jericho, and Chris Benoit. Chris Jericho is the reigning WWE World champion, and has been since 23 September 2012. Cole Scorpio is the reigning World Heavyweight champion, and has been since 24 June 2012. John Cena is the reigning WWE United States champion, and has been since 29 July 2012.

The Match: First Fall : Wack kick from HHH. Big kick from HHH staggers Punk but that's about it. Hooks the leg for a two count. CM Punk once again takes the advantage after blocking a few punches and connecting with some forearms. Back heel kick off the second rope, HHH goes down. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! CM Punk misses a clothesline. HHH hits a piledriver on CM Punk. I know I wouldn't let someone that bad give me a piledriver. Cover gets three for Triple H, Punk got pinned. Second Fall : BIG clothesline on Colt. Full nelson slam on Colt. Hooks the leg for a two count. Colt Cabana comes up with a right hand out of nowhere. DDT from the top rope by Colt Cabana. That looked KILLER. John Cena is in trouble. Here it comes - Colt 45. 1....2...3, it's finished. Third Fall : Bryan Danielson connects with a back heel kick on Benoit and gets back up quickly. Second rope flying axe handle, Benoit goes down. One day, Danielson might even consider coming off the top with that. You know...for more impact and stuff. Covers for a quick two count. Benoit blocks a kick from Bryan Danielson. BURNING HAMMER~! from Chris Benoit is executed with perfect brutally! Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! Chris Benoit misses a clothesline. Spinning bulldog in the corner and Benoit is down! ONE...TWO...THREE. Danielson defeats Benoit. Fourth Fall : Rude Awakening neckbreaker on Triple H by Colt. Remember when that was a legit finish? Flying cross body off the top rope! There's a two count on the pin. HHH ducks a wild right hand. Triple H scores with a crappy looking standing spinebuster. Could have been done a hell of a lot better though. Triple H moves in for the kill. Pedigree!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!! Fifth Fall : Chris Sabin hits a rolling kick on Jericho. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. Jericho takes a NICE hurrancarana from Chris Sabin. There's a two count on the pin. Chris Sabin misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. Diamond Dust from Chris Jericho, Sabin is out! Chris Sabin gets knocked to the ground by Jericho. Here it comes...Lion Tamer! Chris Sabin taps! Sixth Fall : Chris Jericho hits a rolling kick on Danielson. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. Flying cross body off the top rope! Hooks the leg for a two count. Danielson backdrops Chris Jericho out of a piledriver attempt. That took a lot out of Bryan Danielson. Vicious kick to the teeth from Bryan Danielson. Chris Jericho gets knocked to the ground by Danielson. Rollover Double Underhook!!! Chris Jericho taps out! Seventh Fall : Hard back suplex on Rock. Come to think of it, that move had WAY too much power in No Mercy for N64. Rock takes a NICE hurrancarana from Bryan Danielson. Covers for a quick two count. Bryan Danielson misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. Death valley driver by The Rock! No one executes that move properly anymore. Bryan Danielson is in trouble. Rock Bottom! 1....2....3. Eighth Fall : Big kick from HHH staggers Cole but that's about it. Big clothesline from HHH. Hooks the leg for a two count. Cole Scorpio is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Cole face jams Triple H. Triple H can barely stand. Scorpio Bomb!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!! Final Fall : Cole hits a spinning back kick. All those spinning kicks look alike, don't they. Hooks the leg for a two count. Back heel kick from Cole on Rock but it misses by miles. Flying knee to the face from Cole Scorpio. For the record it was more of a Rusty Wizard than a Shining one. Hooks the leg! ONE...TWO...NO! The Rock reverses a hip toss. Cole reverses an irish whip...and The Rock runs into the referee! The Rock moves in for the kill. Rock Bottom! Hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! Fallaway slam by The Rock puts down Cole Scorpio. Cole Scorpio powers out of a The Rock headlock. Cole Scorpio has The Rock down on the canvas. Scorpio Lock!!! The Rock taps out!

WINNERS: The Gods of Indie

SPECIAL STIPULATION FOR TONIGHT: The competitors of the fatal four way MUST DEFEND their spots tonight.

Hank Hanson vs Hurricane.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Hurricane strikes Hanson. Hurricane uses a basement dropkick to the knee and it looks like it might be TIME TO GO TO SCHOOL~! Hanson takes a NICE hurrancarana from Hurricane. Spear! Hanson is down! Hanson scores with a forearm, sending Hurricane down into the corner. The referee pulls Hank Hanson away to get the break. Wait! Hurricane has pulled something out of his tights. Hank Hanson walks over...and gets floored by a punch! 1....2....3! The referee never saw the brass knuckles!

WINNER: The Hurricane

Rey Mysterio vs Dark Angel.

Match Background: None.

The Match: DA scoops and slams Rey Mysterio. What's the difference between a scoop slam and a body slam anyway? Rey Mysterio pulls a mule kick out of nowhere. STIFF high kick on DA by Rey Mysterio. Rey whips DA into the turnbuckles...and the ref is crushed! Tor-NADO DDT from Rey Mysterio, DA got planted! Hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! DA flips out of a Rey Mysterio bodyslam attempt. Rey Mysterio charges into the corner, but EATS BOOT and staggers backward. Gutwrench into a powerbomb, aka the Doctor Bomb and Rey hits hard. Covers for a quick two count. Dark Angel scores with a big spinebuster. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Rey ducks a wild right hand. Rey crushes DA with a running senton. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Dark Angel powers out of a Rey Mysterio headlock. Rey Mysterio is in trouble. Heaven to Hell! 1....2....3.

WINNER: Dark Angel

Mike Cole vs The Rock.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Mike hits a quick kick on Rock. Rock backdrops Mike Cole out of a piledriver attempt. That took a lot out of The Rock. Mike takes a headbutt from The Rock. Mike Cole charges, Rock moves, and the referee is knocked silly! High Angle DDT by The Rock just SPIKES Mike Cole down! Hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! The Rock misses a clothesline. Rock takes a vertical suplex from Mike Cole. Mike Cole scores with a face jam on The Rock. Covers for a quick two count. Mike Cole blasts Rock with a superkick. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Rock counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Rock hits a piledriver on Mike Cole. That used to end matches, you know. Pin, but Mike is out just before the three count. Mike counters a sleeper with a jaw breaker and is able to get free! Mike Cole floors Rock near the ropes and makes the pin. Mike is using the ropes for leverage! The referee hasn't seen it: 1....2....3!!

WINNER: Mike Cole (therefore he is still in the fatal four way at No Mercy)

Phillip Phillips vs Brock Lesnar.

Match Background: None.

The Match: Standing leg lariat by Phillip Phillips on Lesnar. Brock Lesnar fights out of a grapple. Lesnar scoops and slams Phillip Phillips. What's the difference between a scoop slam and a body slam anyway? Phillip reverses an irish whip...and Brock Lesnar runs into the referee! Death valley driver by Brock Lesnar! No one executes that move properly anymore. Hooks the leg, but the referee is still out! Brock Lesnar misses a big legdrop after stalling too long. Phillip uses a basement dropkick to the knee and it looks like it might be TIME TO GO TO SCHOOL~! SUPER frankensteiner on Lesnar, who hit hard and is loopy as a result. There's a two count on the pin. Lesnar walks into a face crusher variation. Has anyone's face ever really been crushed by one though? Pin, but Lesnar is out just before the three count. Brock Lesnar is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. Spear by Brock Lesnar. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Brock Lesnar gets taken down out of nowhere! Brock Lesnar is in trouble. Phillips Screwdriver!!! That shook the ring. 1....2....3!!

WINNER: Phillip Phillips (Therefore he is still in the Fatal Four Way)

Randy Orton vs Randy Reaume.

Match Background: Randy Orton is the reigning WWE Intercontinental champion, and has been since 23 September 2012.

The Match: Running knee lift from Randy Orton. Full nelson slam on Randy. Covers for a quick two count. Randy counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Randy Reaume kicks the leg, knocks Orton down, and goes to work on it. Randy hits a dropkick on Randy Orton and gets right back up. Covers for a quick two count. Springboard dropkick from Randy Reaume. Nicely done. Pinfall attempt: ONE...TWO...NO! I would have bought that as the finish! Randy Reaume hits a rolling kick on Orton. Konnan has ruined any chance for me ever enjoying this maneuver again with his shitty execution of it. Randy walks into a drop toe hold. Full nelson slam on Randy. Hooks the leg for a two count. Powerbomb on Randy. Cover, ONE...TWO...NO! I honestly thought that match was going to end right then and there. Flying shoulder tackle by Orton sends Randy CRASHING to the mat. Trying to channel the spirit of Misawa, Randy Orton ends up chanelling Lex Luger instead and nails a running forearm to the face, minus the steel plate, of course. Randy Reaume reverses a hip toss. Flying elbow from Randy Reaume connects. Diamond Dust from Randy Reaume and Orton is out! Phillip Phillips comes running down the aisle and onto the apron! Orton turns...and is dropped throat-first onto the top rope by Phillip! Phillip Phillips has left Orton in big trouble. Randy Reaume has Randy Orton down on the canvas. Here it comes...Anaconda Vice! Randy Orton taps!

WINNER: Randy Reaume (therefore he stays in the fatal four way at No Mercy)

Cole Scorpio vs Kane.

Match Background: This will be a cage bout. Cole Scorpio is the reigning World Heavyweight champion, and has been since 24 June 2012.

The Match: Kane gets hip tossed by Cole. Cole Scorpio launches Kane into the cage wall. Cole climbs the cage...but Kane is in hot pursuit, and they both end up back on the canvas. Cole Scorpio arm drags Kane over and locks on an armbar. Cole hits a spinning back kick. All those spinning kicks look alike, don't they. Kane counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Kane drives Cole into the cage side. Nice piledriver on Cole. Kane and Cole climb the cage....but both end up crashing back to the canvas after a struggle! Cole reverses a waistlock. Cole Scorpio uses a running dropkick into the corner. That was just...ugh. Flying knee to the face from Cole Scorpio. For the record it was more of a Rusty Wizard than a Shining one. Kane is able to duck a clothesline attempt and connect with a counter clothesline. STIFF~! chop lights up Cole who covers up to try and stop the agonizing PAIN! Cole counters a backdrop attempt with a kick to the face and hit a clothesline! Cole climbs the cage...but Kane is in hot pursuit, and they both end up back on the canvas. Kane takes a knee lift from Cole. *sigh* Running knee lifts always remind me of the late Curt Hennig. Kane can barely stand. Scorpio Bomb!!! That shook the ring. Kane climbs the cage...but gets pulled off by Cole Scorpio, who then climbs up and over! We have a winner!

WINNER: Cole Scorpio

RCF RAW hasn't been good since I left.