Posts : 665 Pointz : 10248 Thanks Hit : 11 Join date : 2012-03-18 Age : 24
Subject: What the actual fuck? Tue Jun 26, 2012 1:58 pm
~ An agitated Matt Knoxville is sat in his locker room, he looks rather uncomfortable and seems determined not to talk. Finally he looks up at the camera to see Jacob Culver ~
Matt Knoxville Piss off, all of you.
Jacob Culver Why?
Matt Knoxville Because I know what you're going to ask, "What do you think of your opponent tonight?" and I've had enough of it, you know what I'll say.
~ Silence ~
Jacob Culver ....And that is?
Matt Knoxville My opponent is a joke, plain and simple, just like my last opponent was! Dave Maverick paid the price when he stepped in the ring with me and then went and dug a hole then hid in it, didn't he? Now I have someone who is even more of a joke, Bingo McSpazzler? Dingo McDazzler? But to the point, I'm a wasted talent in this company, yes I am getting a title shot for the Revelation Championship but against who? MIKE COLE, ANOTHER JOKE. You see? Now to completely decimate yet another idiot to get in my way, another stepping stone in my career, another wrestler trying to stop me from reaching my full potential. This....
~ Jacob whispers "Ringo McGazzler" ~
Matt Knoxville This Ringo McGazzler is a comedy act and every member of the crowd knows precisely that, just as I do. I stumbled upon Ringo a few days ago and I must admit he is the most annoying person I have ever met in my career, and remember it was only two weeks ago I faced Dave Maverick! I truly am tired of facing idiots and jokes like this man but I don't think it will ever stop, so in that case I ask Ringo to bring everything he has for his match against me because if he doesn't, in Layman's terms, he's going to be crushed like a rusty old car in the junkyard. I hope none of you have heard his entrance music either because it is absolutely terrible! I'll play it.
~ Matt types something into his PC before setting it in front of the camera ~
Matt Knoxville This man's debut is going to be exactly like Dave Maverick's, he'll be utterly diminished by me and kicked off of my heels, he'll be brushed off my shoulders like dust from the ceiling. Ringo McGazzler may think he's got what it takes to beat me but he sure as hell doesn't, I was five to nothing in Anarchy Wrestling Organization and to be honest I've never even heard of this guy, no wait, I think I have..... Wasn't he the guy off Dodgeball with the walrus mustache? Ringo looks like an idiot and probably wre-, has fits like an idiot when he gets squashed in all his matches. Jacob, I've only ever lost once since joining this company including AWO and that was against Cole Scorpio, that wasn't even the real me, but I'm the real me now, I'm the true Matt Knoxville that destroys everyone who steps in his way and loves it when he's booed because HE'S THE MAN YOU LOVE TO HATE!
I think I've said enough, Jacob. Oh, one more thing, at WEW's first Pay-Per-View; Genesis, it won't be Ringo McGazzler I'm crushing, it'll be you, Mike Cole, I hope you're ready to lose out on yet another Championship...
~ Matt leaves the locker room shutting the door behind him, the screen goes black ~
